The Queen Has Spoken - Death Monologues: Renegotiating
I was head over heels in love with him. We laughed and talked then he said I am call you back after I shower. That call never came but instead the next morning they announced he'd gotten his wings shortly after that shower. I fell in the floor grasping my heart I never knew pain like that. I had to go home and tell my husband to give US time to mourn a man who was not him. He honored my request. We cried seemed like forever. He was the only father my children really knew then. Every time we are near his grave we visit him.
The STING of losing HIM lasted for YEARS! I never knew I'd ever have to feel the depth of sorrow in my heart like that ever again. But losing my grandson has superseded any measure of pain of longing for his presence I ever thought I could ever feel. In just the ONLY one MONTH since my grandson got his wings I have really learned the true character of people close to my family and me. These revelations have been DEVASTATING and really PAINSTAKING. Truthfully WE have had to cut off some people ... they had some real TOXIC agendas that WE were blind too, accepted, or ignored prior to our Crown Prince leaving us. Others we ARE praying and asking GOD for the strength to RENEGOTIATE their presence in our LIVES collectively and individually.
I share this intimate snippet into our PRIVATE lives in hopes many will reexamine those close to you. Often we are partnered up with people who DO NOT have our best interest at heart. Time is equally fleeting and consuming but never RECOVERED. So I beseech you to not be like me knowing you have more to leave in this world but get a REALITY SHOT in the HEART that jolts you into living your BEST LIFE NOW! If you are reading this post then some measure of my heart LOVES you and wants you to root for YOU, YOUR DESIRES, and YOUR DREAMS! It is time to WIN at living and LIVE OUR BEST LIVES TODAY!
*** ***I originally began this scribbling in November 2018 but never published it.***