Monday, September 9, 2019



Many are so used to the "STRONG" person in the group or community being strong, present, and of course AVAILABLE! But how many times have you actually checked on their MENTAL HEALTH and WELL BEING and ACTUALLY meant IT!?!

Nah they may not be depressed but they very well may be having a moment of  DISCOURAGEMENT and perhaps feeling DISENFRANCHISED all because they have been beset on a road of transparent and apparent SERVITUDE.

Come on NOW lend me your heart through your eyes! How many times have you reached out to them for something (no matter  how major or minor) with no real forethought or afterthought towards their current state of existence?!?!

Some of your STRONG leaders in community, church, and family are synonymous with health problems, poor thoughts of existence, and some of them even considered tragic extremes to numb the pain of being alone (even if they have families) to SERVE in EXCELLENCE for OTHERS!

รจ Here is my point many SERVANT LEADERS or the STRONG ONES you have become accustomed to leaning on for support actually need it too.  They may not need the daily cheerleading, moral support, or outright grab and tugs those they are charged with to motivate into betterment but they do need YOU WHO are THEY that have gleaned from them to say HEY I see you and HOW can I MAKE YOUR DAY better TODAY?

So I charge you reading this do an ACT of RANDOM KINDNESS to someone you KNOW GIVES IT ALL for OTHERS DAILY and HAS NEVER asked for ANYTHING in RETURN. 

Here are a few suggestions....

v  Pick up the phone and actually call them and be willing to ACTUALLY listen to them share about themselves as they have for YOU or so MANY others.  (Often times SO/SL don't need you to solve any problems for them. They just want someone to hear how HUMAN they actually are.)  Through a moment of sharing they're renewing their strength to SERVE another day. So please willing to give of yourself to aid in the continuance of their servitude.

v  Sow into their lives via a random financial gift or cover a financial burden they may have. No one is asking you to become financially responsible for them. Just know if you have NEVER asked them for any financial support PLENTY of others HAVE and received it. Sometimes STRONG ONES / SERVANT LEADERS have not been good stewards over their own finances because they give to the detriment of themselves. (Many SO/SL learn later in life how to balance giving/sharing of their resources without depleting their own sources.) So this random gift will change the trajectory of their own financial plights even if more a moment.

v  Show up and be present. Remember how you felt when they showed up for YOU or how someone connected to YOU felt when THEY showed up or someone like THEM showed UP. The power of presence is one of the most neglected affirmations of human interconnectedness on EARTH! We don’t give of our PRESENCE enough.  Go share the power of positive energy exchange by just BEING and allowing them to BE!  No flowery WORDS or extravagant GIFTS needed just be PRESENT.  Perhaps when you arrive to just BE PRESENT you will uncover a PROJECT they have not had the manpower or time to fulfill for all the TIME they spend aiding in the BETTERMENT of OTHERS!

v  Become CONSIDERATE of what it takes for STRONG ONES and SERVANT LEADERS to do what they do! NOPE this is not an invitation for you to get out of your comfy box and check in to a new GEO-SHAPE positively executed by STRONG ONES or SERVANT LEADERS. But rather a  MINDSET SHIFT for your LENSES to become more EMPATHIC for THEM that are THEY who lead often times  in SILENCE for so many DAILY!

Obviously there are more ways to be a blessing to those STRONG ONES and SERVANT LEADERS in your community, church, and family so pick a point of reference and sow an ACT of RANDOM KINDNESS into their LIVES TODAY!

I leave you in LOVE and I lead you in LIGHT! Sending you good vibrations and the power of positive change!

#The Queen Has Sp0ken #eachONEreachONE #ServantLEADER #STRONGones #SOWEDstrong #ZEPSgarden #COACHA #Koinonia #CommunalCULTURE #Interconnectedness #HUMANity #ActsofRandomKINDNESS #sowREALLY #theGIVINGGARDENS  

Monday, July 15, 2019

The Queen Has Spoken - Death Monologues: Renegotiating

The Queen Has Spoken - Death Monologues: Renegotiating

I was head over heels in love with him. We laughed and talked then he said I am call you back after I shower. That call never came but instead the next morning they announced he'd gotten his wings shortly after that shower. I fell in the floor grasping my heart I never knew pain like that. I had to go home and tell my husband to give US time to mourn a man who was not him. He honored my request. We cried seemed like forever. He was the only father my children really knew then. Every time we are near his grave we visit him.

The STING of losing HIM lasted for YEARS! I never knew I'd ever have to feel the depth of sorrow in my heart like that ever again. But losing my grandson has superseded any measure of pain of longing for his presence I ever thought I could ever feel. In just the ONLY one MONTH since my grandson got his wings I have really learned the true character of people close to my family and me. These revelations have been DEVASTATING and really PAINSTAKING. Truthfully WE have had to cut off some people ... they had some real TOXIC agendas that WE were blind too, accepted, or ignored prior to our Crown Prince leaving us. Others we ARE praying and asking GOD for the strength to RENEGOTIATE their presence in our LIVES collectively and individually.

I share this intimate snippet into our PRIVATE lives in hopes many will reexamine those close to you. Often we are partnered up with people who DO NOT have our best interest at heart. Time is equally fleeting and consuming but never RECOVERED. So I beseech you to not be like me knowing you have more to leave in this world but get a REALITY SHOT in the HEART that jolts you into living your BEST LIFE NOW! If you are reading this post then some measure of my heart LOVES you and wants you to root for YOU, YOUR DESIRES, and YOUR DREAMS! It is time to WIN at living and LIVE OUR BEST LIVES TODAY!

*** ***I originally began this scribbling in November 2018 but never published it.***

Intra-Perspective ME Speaking!!!

I am always working on me. There is not a moment in my adult life this hasn't been true. However there have been times it wasn't the main focus. The closer I get to 50 the more I have learned how important it is to remember yourself. It doesn't mean you've forgotten, given up, or changed how you love or handle love for others. It just means in your absence what is said about you shouldn't been more important than taking care of yourself.

We only get one life and one body LOVE the HELL out of IT! I literally mean this! Don't accept the boundaries nor live in the borders others have placed you in. Live LIFE OUT LOUD! Love OUT LOUD! LOVE HARD and LOVE OFTEN! So when the your name is called for that final curtain call you will not have lived in regret of putting yourself on the back burner yet again to save, give, or live for someone else as they are GROWING on without YOU! Yes I mean GROWING ON without YOU!

I don't REGRET not one SINGLE moment of giving or lending myself or my resources to anyone or anything whose life or movement was better because of it! However there comes a time where the word BALANCE is threshold of existing we should all strive to live IN! Giving to the depletion of your resolve is SO UNHEALTHY!

I know I have created a believable and usable and repeatable legacy my children and my community can build upon. However it is more important to me that I admit the errors in how hard it has been to build this legacy and making sure they know there are ways to live life as a servant leader without giving up of yourself in totality hoping one day to regain the morsels of vitality left to recreate a space safe for you to say I am choosing me and not feel guilty cause you have accepted this as a badge of honor as you have trained others to have unlimited access to you and your resources.

I choose me finally. Shifting my perspective of giving of myself was not easy. It took losing the tiniest, most precious, most loving person I ever met for me to remember me. I know I attempted many times before to choose me but I erred I choose just the parts of me accessible to be borrowed by others instead of all of me.

I took an intra-perspective look at myself and begin refashioning what it means to LOVE. Love is not about how much you give access of yourself or your resources to others. It is about how you surrender them in space for them to gain appreciation for every breath that is better because of your place in their lives.

I will never STOP giving of myself or my resources for the collective to become a better Koinonia or to have better Umoja for Ubuntu is my apex of existence. However I had to stop surrendering parts of myself in totality and constantly damaging my Kuumba in hopes it will be fully restored and replenished later! 

So in other words .........


Me: New Intra-Perspective